Why We Say that Time Heals

There are a lot of incorrect notions about the saying that time heals all. When we say that time heals, we do not mean that it erases. Time cannot undo things that have been done, words that have been said, and most importantly, the ways we have made people feel. No length of life has the capability to completely take back the actions and the memories that have hurt us the most.

However, time does something for us that is much more valuable than the erasure of a mistake that could spawn growth. What it does is enable us to understand. With the passage of each day, we are given the advantage of hindsight—an invaluable tool for continuing to live. Time does not heal because we forget. Time heals because the further removed in time we are from an event, a decision, or a mistake, the better we are able to see it objectively and the better we are able to see ourselves objectively, outside of the context of the moment. When we can view an event void of emotion or bias, we can see where we can change. We can see where we should change.

After mistakes have been made, time makes everything a little bit easier. It may not make a situation easier to bear, but what it does do is make us understand a situation more and more, and make us more readily available to accept why things are the way they are, and give us a direction in which to point ourselves and our lives. We all probably wish, at one time or another, that time would merely make something easier to bear. But the “easy” is not just given to us. It must be earned through acceptance, responsibility, and a will to change and grow.

Maybe time makes us better simply because of its limiting nature. It reminds us about how few days we have. When we have heart, we are forced to change. Acceptance means refusing to hold a grudge against your own soul, and seeing the world through clearer eyes, even though at times it may force you to see yourself in a negative light. It does not mean forgetting, but it does mean forgiving others and yourself, while simultaneously acknowledging that life will not be the same as before if it is not meant to.


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